A few years ago I was booked to do a piece about oval bites on this morning, I turned up nice and early to prepare, whilst Lorraine Kelly's section of GMTV was still on air, ITV weren't expecting me to arrive so early, and some confusion ensued. Lorraine was due to interview comedy sensation and friend of Peter Kay, Patrick Mcguinness. Unfortunately Patrick had arrived late, and the Lorraine producers mistook my good self for him, and ushered me out for the interview, I assumed they'd pushed me up the schedule to fill a gap or something, the error didn't really occur to anyone for a while, what with my thick Geordie accent and her thick Scottish accent no one had a clue what we were talking about.
Some of the questions included:
"So, are you going to film another series of pheonix nights?"
"Yes, sometimes I work nights, if we need an extra pair of hands to get the baguettes ready"
"What's it like to work with Peter Kay?"
"Ah, yes, when I was 17 I did spend a summer working on a farm, but I'm afraid bailing hay didn't come under my duties"
"What do they think of your success back home in Bolton?"
"I met Michael Bolton once, he came into the shop once for a lunchtime meal deal, nice chap"
"When is take me out back?"
"You want me to take you out the back?"
"December the first?"
"I fail to see the relevance of Damien Hurst in all of this"
"Is it a fun show to film?"
"No, I got the train down love"
"Have you got any plans for the future?"
"We're opening a new shop in Bradford next month"
By the time we cut to a break and I took my leave a confused Patrick was stood at the side of the set, I explained to him the situation and he found it quite funny, in fact we kept in touch, you may have noticed he stars in our advertising campaigns.
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